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Scattered Resistance v4 - Settling In

by Wetdryvac's Lair

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1.
Song of the Gun 02:30
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Song of the Gun November 30, 1991 black, cold rolled steel riffled bore and soulless metal this is the song of the gun he lies there, unmoving victim of his own undoing unrecognizable - a chiseled grey forty-four - custom grade his weapon - so goes the first verse those who take the other path no longer happy with any old world in the street we find a second victimized by those who like the gun had no souls shot in darkness metal from the barrel of a walnut forty-four - his long walk became a longer walk out into the night so goes the second verse those eliminated for what they are where then the end, a wrong place in another home the third is found victim of a wife who knew full well his actions left him for another, left him crumpled against the bedroom wall again tailored killing of the favorite weapon another grey and heavy forty-four - so goes the third verse those killed for prior action revenge as its own justification - he cried out his sorrows on his last breath we find the fourth in a heap lying among thousands on a battlefield taken down by an army of might victim of yet another somehow just cause and a last black forty-four - as with all the others he knows now nothing simply packs his thoughts and sets out down the longer road to night so goes the fourth, the final verse those killed by the strong for the will of the world in each sung verse I clink to madness falling from my calm nest as I see what the world can do and call right - there is no justification needed today for the fools we have become just stepping into the firing line willingly - into the arms of flame and thunder quietly children I'll sing you the song of the gun
2.
And There It Goes Again 00:40
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And There it Goes Again November 29, 1991 the smell of gunpowder burning, reaches me rising from my kitchen table uh boy - my land mine is on fire time to run... I reach the living room just as my kitchen table commits pretty suicide all over the place hell - fresh polish blown to smithereens the second time this week and worse yet inside maybe just maybe my parents could have been right - make it better than all the rest, they'd said but not while cooking breakfast
3.
Over Disunion 00:39
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Over Disunion December 2, 1991 I feel I'm falling I'm dancing on air free floating and flying who cares? the rest of the world can go on without me I stay here where never can anyone touch me I go on - shall we end the silence? I see that you are not like me you set out as you will and take what comes so be it this is why I call you friend differences all part of the game made one of life and dropped like falling
4.
Once Remembered 00:41
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Once Remembered Dec 11, 1991 to my author to you who always hurts as your words cut to the bone you twist all I have til I have compulsion I should look up to you but the delineation is clear between kind and kin I swear no matter cuttings and parings far down the branch the anger must be contained as must I - son, anger becomes anguish at a turn
5.
To You Who Knows 00:47
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To You Who Knows December 12, 1991 this is something I find to be interesting something I find within myself I am happy with those I can talk to those I can disagree with and not hate those I can relax with let what I am show through this shell without protection dance or spar near fatality without fear for fear is the limiting factor hardening people to life beyond the necessary when I meet someone I can talk to be safe around then happiness is simplicity those one can sleep with simply sleep without waiting for the knife allow existence
6.
Viewfinder 01:04
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Viewfinder December 16, 1991 my conclusion is drawn from power a power not my own a simple observation of the usage of might that armies rise and fall like canes civilizations crashing to chaos in their wake one less people, one less race one less place to call your own you will find out if you look out into the dank cold world there is nothing just sandy waste but everybody wants to rule the world take it with them to their graves everybody wants to call the world their own for keeps though all is darkness, all is shadows as on the plains dust storms rise carbon dioxide no longer atlanticly absorbed all the problems no one answer just a little fight for power no care in this last dying hour everybody pushing to rule the world
7.
Wire Guide 01:59
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Wire Guide December 11, 1991 one two three jump - red light tonight gotta get out of here ain't got no way to plot my flight can't I get out of here - gotta run out to tomorrow try to hide out in the hedge rows duck from the serpents meant long to chase me you may find but you can never touch me send your need send your disease in my path to breathing cast in the night block my flight I'm not carefree for nothing, you know just duck out onto the open road tonight red light tonight gotta get out of here ain't got no way to plot my flight but I live to get out of here now it's done cold to the marrow second sign here come the shadows hide in the darkness from you last calling I can't brace against a sky that's falling take back your need extract disease one lost in night I lost my light I'm not carefree for nothing you know just taking refuge outside the asylum it's bright red light tonight gotta get out of here blind down the path of second sight only just now free from here conquered fear conquered hate now I've broken out of here broke down the night believed my first sight now I've closed out my last fear now I've broken out of here but you're still here in here and though it's light out on the road it's cold so very cold out here
8.
Identity 01:02
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Identity December 16, 1991 I am the curator in my museum of memories here I walk alone look at the dusty thoughts upon my shelves and talk to them in my dreams here I see through the looking glass out into a field of unending night dotted on it's plain are promises I have forgotten those I left behind each exhibit a part of me a glance confirms a place or a person I have known and though it's all in random order now I thought I once knew all strange that age has taken over from immortality placing a veil of fog across some exhibits obscuring totally others I am my memories an expression of my being when these fade away to nothing there is nothing - I cease to be
9.
Song of Dawning 01:11
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Song of Dawning December 17, 1991 I dance about throw myself across my living room can't believe the joy of the day 'cause it's all right all right sun just rose beyond the night today is somehow a glorious day woke up in the morning as I seem to do so often jumped from my bed to greet the day couldn't believe how the sun shone so brightly down upon the snow today... ...on in this crap fashion I danced about my brain that day came up with this stupid poem and on it went la la la la for rather a long time la la please forget you ever read it blah blah blah blah blah... (Where did you learn to drive?) but it felt good to write white heat and all that jive nice to be alive, just shut your bloody gob wot? la la la la la... (Where did you learn to drive?) some people have an amazing attention span
10.
Survivor 01:19
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Survivor December 17, 1991 I'm waiting - waiting for the lightning sent from the sky - coming to get me in my bunker - it grows colder night folds in on us - like a hunter child I'm waiting - waiting for the cattle trucks sent from the barrens - take my people away in the ghettos - we are starving watch the iron cross - take up our children in its arms I'm waiting - waiting for the mushroom cloud sudden sunburn - wipe away my city broken hearted - broken bodies line the city walls - armed to the teeth I'm waiting - waiting for the holocaust and the aftermath - of a world at war it grows colder - day by day now who could stop them anyhow we tried to fight - but it's summer now we could not fight
11.
Sorrow's Song 02:01
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Sorrow's Song December 17, 1991 this time I know I'm all alone that there's no one left to turn to in this colossal waste I look out across the sand see the sunrise orange fingers spreading across my morning sky see a white flash join the dawn my silence broken by this sudden song of night I watch the cloud rise from the plain feel the heat waves join my pain in the blinding light nowhere to turn, nowhere to run the song and dance of the world has come undone today I watch the wave of light come my way from the shadows of early morning feel it rip my soul apart had nothing from the start I suppose, so anyway there is nothing left thought it was the start of a new day - no flesh blows off my broken bones one dark afterimage left in my pleading eyes don't leave me all alone here I don't know where the world is going to go to but the flash signs it is done the desert ripples as the war has begun again this time no thousands writhe in pain, good the world is left in peace today, mankind in pieces who gave a damn about it anyway, not you or I though it was we could have stopped the carnage and when it's over peace will rain watch the heat waves dance in no one's vision, none are left to see there is nothing left but ocean and a steady blacking rain sheeting down from the sky on a barren of ashes and diamond glaring without sun, on nothing peace remains
12.
Reversal 01:36
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Reversal December 18, 1991 I cried alone the guard only comes down then outside of the others a symbol of insecurity I suppose I almost never laugh not really - differentiation between social and actual I never get angry without ever stopping, I never get angry - liar - just sway back and smile tight face and chameleon never pressing alone so different burning for hours running until I cannot stop burning immaculate fire perfection in the flames within a nothing hurting world inverse reflection somehow cold beyond tempering steeling never relax judgment fades so - reactions step ahead of thought intensity beyond perfection restrained control fright it's a fine line between this and that side of sanity comforting myself from time to time that destruction was dead simple to learn and easy, like forgetting like silence waiting suffices sometimes hiding in a shell of someone I created mostly on purpose by accident hoping for a weakness in myself I might exploit such a funny game
13.
Help, or Something Less, Akin 00:54
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Help, or Something Less, Akin December 18, 1991 she had told him no not once but repeatedly swearing she'd been pure - he became part of her pushing inward like he'd had practice she came to ask me why, tears in her eyes could take no comfort, afraid to be touched again, ever, I had no answer and she wouldn't tell me his name the hurt's supposed to fade in a year but the flicker's still in her eyes like a scar right across the cornea, a cat's vertical slit and you almost can't help staring at her neck when she talks because her voice changed too when she screamed her larynx apart
14.
Atom 00:50
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Atom December 13, 1991 the world kicks and screams whirls and dashes my hopes away running like blood, my tears when I see this - place - left over falling through my fingers dreams like broken glass I step out onto the obsidian horizon walk around the edges of a crystal bowl nearly a mile across, holding poisoned water down near the bottom, reservoir of tears all the broken dreams lying glazed in this hole that was a pasture beautiful that destruction can be a polished thing blue black iridescence like burned copper
15.
Final Line 00:46
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Final Line January 2, 1992 we are afraid of death minimize it as the long sleep - a change of plane - a journey to some higher god - unable to accept any finality that there may be no absolution cringing pious promising some hard god good and right lest we be dragged down I could care less of the end it's likenesses or distance but death comes like a thief to my night takes all I know all I cared for leaving me with earth dirt cage for my fears in the night
16.
Losing Battle 01:17
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Losing Battle January 2, 1992 I am receding sometime going out of touch loosing firm control sleeping during the day now waking at night to an empty house nothing to loose by sleep cleaning what trash I can - by doing becoming, regardless cycle - replacing trash insane my companions drowning in their shallow thoughts unwilling to free themselves I'd sleep to hid, to sleep perchance - but analogy like Shakespeare, is simply words on a page they hurt each other of themselves behind my smile a facade to escape sleep to escape to dream and nothingness each other hurting room silent bed crushed by the fat bass layering in sound drowning out the hurt shivering loud and ready for night to come slippery quiet home
17.
Identity 01:04
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Identity January 4, 1992 I am me nothing can change this decisions are mine to make limited by social convention or fear of loosing pace but the choice itself the act is me you may have my body break it up, devour but pain is a delicate friend of mine in a crucible of my own torture I remain clear of mind beware those who guard their freedom closely memory alone can stand so firm that my father's father fought before me I'll never let his hopes die of memory forlorn you may remove my solitude but smashed and dying barely breathing I remain free
18.
Entrance 00:30
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Entrance January 4, 1992 blackness contemplation of nothing nothing in here but a void in the dark warmth and comfort soft sounds pressure like being born each day begins with pain akin to knife stabbing light ideal
19.
Kewarf 00:26
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Kewarf January 4, 1992 I've always known caring as warmth someone to hold or hold me someone I can tell my tales help to laugh in the dark but now though I create shelter comfort in life's night I cannot shelter myself
20.
Foolhardy 00:32
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Foolhardy January 4, 1992 many are those who profess undying love many are the promises spoken softly in the night and many are the broken hearts those used and left abandoned and many are the simple folk who share many are the simple fools who cannot say I'm sorry so many people shattered by a burden two could bear
21.
Out Take 00:32
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Out Take January 4, 1992 when there is nothing left in this cold world but hunger, disease, war, and death and the tanks hold the enemy just clear of my town when there's nothing left but agony as terminal condition no hope I'll step out onto the longer road to night prey to come upon a better place and feed me there
22.
From Broken Minds 00:39
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From Broken Minds January 7, 1992 in a darkened mental corridor I run talk talk talk away from the argument inside my head they tell me that I'm dying ruin and rage before passing no time in a world that has no hold on me ephemeral to the corruption cornered in a mental cell talk talk talk alone and some voices I ruin
23.
Blockage 00:28
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Blockage January 12, 1992 I am sitting in my winter clothing passing bits of prose and poetry watching as the right words take their place with passing time looking to see if anything falls like logic in my mind finding that though I talk aloud I never admit a single thing just write it down as poetry to pass away the time
24.
Evil Eye 00:50
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Evil Eye January 12, 1992 society has an evil lie one not often held in check by reason it is for this that the Nazis lived it is for this that the Jews were killed not one body in a casket I watch my country I watch my town even and am amazed if society says a thing is wrong so it must be where then are the Catholics and the Protestants? brothers in arms alone? killing each other over belief which by its nature can't be changed since nothing can change a basic nature so why the killing?
25.
Evil Eye II 00:40
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Evil Eye II January 12, 1992 the deviation has a lesser scale than man can't love a man society and its scales of justice span and fall short, spin and fail you can talk about anyone categorized by deviation from the mean but society is anyone's power of speaking telling the rest that faith is no more than listening when after all, faith needs no proof and even dis-proven oft stands
26.
Ice 00:41
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Ice January 13, 1991 close together but far apart no more room for talking when all there was to talk about has passed lost to time steel blue haze where words used to come from close to heart now all hearing lies two lovers close but torn apart leavings like scars of time
27.
March On 02:06
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March On January 12, 1992 in our gilded cage we reason sifted change pressed against the bars we wait summer's come and gone winter's coming on nothing we can do but rage and though the night is long we are growing strong we come into our own today can't stop us now a rolling stone pushes an avalanche repressed for far too long this is the coming dawn our power grows with every step we take and though the enemy slays to halt us our numbers carry on the dead every single one a martyr to our cause we carry on every single movement taken leads the past to be mistaken everyone has a move they have to make in the end all bonds will break all shackles fall by the bitter way all armaments tossed aside into the wind in our gilded cage we feel the seasons' change pressed against the bars we wait summer's come and gone and though winter's coming on we all taste the freedom today when all our pride is gone the feeling pushes strong we will all be free today (Son of a whore, wasn't that a Scorpions song?)
28.
When You Fly 01:44
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When You Fly January 17, 1992 it isn't me it isn't me dream in my head spinning cycling down twisting and trysting pouring fire ripping down my nerve canal nothing left but nothing done dream inside my head remains it isn't me but it can't be you called down the angels destroying angels as we kick to drop the next one the world within my head is breaking and the dream it cycles down flipping twitching something lies dying sinking in a bed of fears screaming out of anger surely out of control on a long black highway the dream it cycles down here come the angels here come the angels friend lend your hand to one in need for a friend leaves not a friend in doing thrusting friendship trusting you are not you it isn't me I know it's you see the skies spin roundabout twitching and screaming at a liquid horizon electric current in my brain fire at the ends of nerves please cut the power cord watch the fires while away their time everything falls down run away - run away - I am not me I am not you crawling across me tickling like feathers stay away - no more bliss no sweet retreat and the dream it cycles down
29.
Silent Eyes 02:03
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Silent Eyes January 18, 1992 baby went a running in the pouring rain think she's found her answers but I'm the one to blame look into her eyes, fires in those lakes only accusation nothing left in place thought I'd join her running in the pouring rain help her find some answers but I'm the one to blame nothing left between us nothing left of friends - thought you'd found your answer but there's nothing left to hold you back flinch away from the pain my darling if you can't take it set across the seas of flames if you can make it no answer written across the burning skies tonight for those eaten by the dark spin away from the pain went and took a run in the pouring rain told me you'd gone swimming with the sharks in the sea of pain I wonder what became of you when you went and ate yourself no one left to love you'd said couldn't trust anyone else I thought I could tell her that the night is all that's left to me I hadn't found her answers but she didn't need to fall away darling is there nothing true with rain? baby went a running in the pouring rain couldn't find her answers and I'm the one to blame all she's left are ashes sitting on a shelf nothing I could tell her no longer trust myself baby went a running in the pouring rain dove into the silent waters we call the fields of Hades nothing much left to me buy crying in the night perhaps I'll join her running in the rain
30.
Arms 00:45
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Arms January 21, 1992 I am only in denial -- mystery masker of double talk maker of mind and hidden emotions creation of a coated shell to hide away within and nothing changes my premonitions as I blink these cold glass eyes my face a master of still water I hide away within I see a place where nothing changes here within my mold interaction with the outside but they never can look in I tried to open a window but the light stays locked away out there
31.
Not... 00:38
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Not . . . January 20, 1992 I dreamed I saw a man running from his sorrows across a desert in his mind he charged until his legs stopped then crawled spent and tired he crashed within problems unchanged and so it is we all run across the face of the world oblivious nothing changes but we keep on running 'til like the fallen we devalue dragged down by our sorrows never changed
32.
To the Trusting 02:12
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To The Trusting January 8, 1992 I look out at my world see it all cold to the core that every belief is being stripped away too many people what hate without knowing why they do reasons abounding and all that matters is the emotion how it builds like the battleship clouds before the storm cold, threatening rising higher than the eye can follow what has become of this world? I remember Afghanistan from what I read in books about how the people in the tunnels waited hours on end while the Soviet troops poured gas in trickles down through the drainage system patient while letting the vapors build then striking flame, not even bothering with the terms and conditions of a surrender that was never to be an option - I inherited their photographs black and white faces lost behind a mechanical wall of silence their situation little more than tactics I remember the smaller scale words of hurt cast reflexively through crowds bustling about in New Orleans, jazz musicians blowing their horns, sometimes taking a quarter or a knife in the gut, blowing their blues and the blues were about endings and losses but lacked what we might call hate I remember the old days but have forgotten what NAZI stands for and remember the music of the time was stepping one line at a time forward as if begging for power feeding upon everyone's roots slow and cold and heavy like acid and iron drums and the blues from the sax wail to the horns played an entropic game across the years not cold, but not forgiving
33.
Cession 00:31
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Cession January 14, 1992 do you feel what I do this pollution strong so strong, being brought to the knees won't even begin to expunge the taking down and it may feel like love mindless brute savage pilgrimage within and I believe in love
34.
Larry 00:43
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Larry January 22, 1992 if you have to search for meaning hidden in words so be it if you have to look at written things more than once and once you'll not offend me but tell me not what is said when I have done with saying you misconstrue my meaning I've no need of your truth for the time being and if the writing makes no sense or forces you to think without convincing stop to ponder for a mile look closely at the track the track is beginning
35.
Fleeting Vision 01:08
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Fleeting Vision January 22, 1992 image - one face of fear one of blood one face of corpulence controlling all one face of peace serene in the chaos of the moment confident all of this is an illusion nothing is real - image - a place where the violent ones go a place to put the would be killers and politicians a space for their practical brand of madness where it can cause no displeasure yelling at the masses on BBC 2 - image - the rest of the world left part of the system able to progress by peaceable means no one need to cause rebellion nothing in demand to rebel from - image - an illusion from a broken mind trying at last to go sane scarred from the weight of the BBC world -
36.
Parade 01:04
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Parade January 24, 1992 look - I will not sleep tonight too many memories swirling in my brain too many losses gathered together at one tomb in one place I cannot cope much longer I'm circling down depression - look - I will not sleep tomorrow night too many things I can no longer look forward to being together with I am what the optimistic call alone dragging around a wound my own size and more some veil of suppuration laid waste about me pretense of safety broken no longer in control of my destiny, if I've still got one life remains the dream untrue for me more like struggle than nightly slumber trying to breathe depression -
37.
Denial 02:34
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Denial January 24, 1992 should I retreat now into solitude should I carve a box in my mind to put the world in should I turn and run and run til I can run from my fears no longer or turn and face them like the man who turns to take the bullet shot through the heart should I close down should I crash slowly like the sinking sun setting into the evening sea or will I hiss and burn to a boil of vapor unable to quench the fire annihilate the single yellow rose sinking in its vase ignore the pain or is there a better answer should I try to talk to those I trust in hopes that the pain will be over for once in my life should I try to bare my soul my weak side where the singers sway is long in need of warmth my dark side always looking for a way to be turned out my inner dreams and agonies the toil of a trial run are stoned and stone from blood hammer and chisel set aside to apply the squeeze from those I knew to trust and the one I care about the most I cannot tell the truth though inside there is dying should I try to run away into the night should I try to hide my soul should I scream out my cries and old laments into the phone should I admit that I am weak, I never had any power should I play the fool and never let go should I set out to find who I really am for I have this hidden fear that I don’t exist should I try to take the pain should I try to tell the one I care for who I really feel though I thought I tried to do that, who has failed should I try to face this night alone when there are so many filling my world I am not cast down I am not cast down I am just not who I want to be – a cry another weakness should I admit I don’t understand, that I am crushed should I rage, should I cant should I give up the world for a home in my head my own little box should I bare my soul to the light of the ones I know I trust, have I or does nothing really matter
38.
To Be True 01:27
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To Be True January 24, 1992 I don’t know the answer changes with the shifting tides times change as the season passes life turns on its local journey a spiral beginning and an end and a place to fill the sadness the place left in the soul another used to fill but I don’t know perhaps to love is to let go I thought to love and loose would be better than the song’s known repose but love it always looses and life it kicks and burns but when you get down to the heart of it take a look at the world spinning by you you realize you cannot catch a soul perhaps to love is to let go and though I love I find the world’s ever changing what was thought to be was never to be had at all just for an instant the flash that cannot help but sear the soul it could start over but the answer changes on the shifting tides of time I never knew it just that I had no experience found – a places inside that was filled up so completely so nothing mattered yet I’m a witness that life will tear your soul perhaps to love is to let go
39.
Paper Dreams 00:53
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Paper Dreams January 27, 1992 I found this book of memories the other day hidden away in the attic among the stacks of shoes and tools it told of a person I’d never had a chance to meet they had such a vision of how to live a life how to deal with all the problems that just seem to turn up they said to me in ancient script “raise your head my child always your lot grows better just hold on to the reigns – raise your head my child life is truth” I do not understand these words rightly they ring of an answer I long have sought but the rest of the book is missing pages torn out
40.
Cross Revelation 02:58
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Cross Revelation January 27, 1992 1) in a shroud you sit behind the altar eyes a mask from your next believer come to seek shelter come to pay penance shuddering in the wrath of your lying god you are the father the one they turn to in imagined sin use them, use them trap them in a descant make them do your dirty work you are the prince of sorrow the master of libelous chains you are the belief that breaks them bends them to your will ah, to make them bow 2) they came to you to be well you make them feel dirty only then to cleanse them make them owe you this, your control you tell them of sinful pleasures wait until they follow drag them scraping through the guilt making sure they have nowhere to run then you kick out their legs lock the shackles ah, to make them bow imagined master they cannot now be clean without you this you know this they know the spider drifting in its web spitting sticky venom there is no better source of blood than those who sacrifice themselves 3) you call out to them tell them what they must do twist them to an unreal god perhaps to make them real assuredly to make them yours my children bow ye down before him you are his – to do his bidding holy crusades and wars to be waged rise up rise up on our master’s word and they follow you lambs to the minted meal of lamb holy wards of inept angels caught up in the reassurance what they do is right bidding is word 4) join me now in the song of killing join me now – revel in the blood of the enemy his is not of our god destroy him of necessity false believer and take his children to the way of light
41.
Reach Out 05:07
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Reach Out January 30, 1992 1) mother there is nothing the vision is destroyed I said mother I can’t see any more all that I believe is melting away mother you told me I could fly you said that I could do anything if I set my mind to it but there is nothing no way to turn the rapid river just give up and float along with it or wait til you go down I thought I could be a teacher an explainer of the ways to life – I thought I could show the world a better way than to come crashing down on the so called lesser ones as the world chooses to term them those that lack the better things or anything at all they start from nothing they see nowhere to go and the world continues its illusion that’s all there is not a better place and the world’s breaking down while they all run 2) and different now, different man not the one you want to meet not the first to say this so get to know me master of illusion is my name and all is going well – forgot that you never need worry my fickle friend you have nothing left yet your pockets bulge with broken words my words, my words in your pocket illusion the game I play I tell you we are gaining ground we all have wars to wage we can fight the communists if anyone still cares we can try to drown in madness we can try to play the game I will tell you almost anything and to think my soul I saved I tell you racism’s at its end that the poor are poor no more that medicine is magical these days I tell you, you can buy anything yet there’s nothing why ask why when you listen to illusion who’s buying anyway 3) back to the first and to be the last as well so to those of you who think all is better you can play the game but the masters of illusion are the people we all know the best and most of anyone fitting fact to lies to tell the tale and ears filled up with their illusion tell you what they do – is what they all must do poll to the game called politician and the people loose you hear their commercials unfortunately tossed your way by magic through the air in all their pomp and glory, perhaps they believe their words but I doubt it know there should be a better way – some of them must some even try to fix the broken world my friend, they say, and please follow me off to nowhere I’ll take you to the end of the road show you despair lead you to an impossible place of bureaucratic nonsense and the balancing of numbers of paper I fight the quota I supported no new taxes but outvoted few new reasons to see the light nothing left but oversight by the blinded no reason to add to that 4) so there are many cures for politics drop a bomb on the bloody nest peace protests, antiwar, black power flower children don’t you know that some have worked? we can end the illusion we can learn to ease the fears of a nation people must be people but we can always travel on let us try to look beyond the night to see a change in the illusion break it down before it breaks its own somebody’s going to have to answer but there are no real people left just a machine and who can fit a soul among the gears you can make a difference cliché those words long ture fight for what you believe in go out of your way to avoid harm argue with a quiet mind to end the pain for the poor to take up their plowshares sharpen them to words who needs the communist relying upon perfect people in a land of none 5) mother you told me I could fly so look at me, I’ve found my wings but the ground’s so very warm watch for a while keep on pushing harder all will learn to clip the wings far from the dirty ground
42.
Singularity 00:19
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Singularity January 30, 1992 two they meet gain confidence slowly learn to communicate finally one
43.
Way Out 00:57
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Way Out January 30, 1992 run my one set the world in motion you can believe in you go faster pass the ground beneath you no need to go somewhere just joy of motion feel better the more you move – the faster you can go I set out late last night took the world beneath my feet set out into timeless darkness partial moon to light my way watched the reflection from the last light snowfall set out across a lake of ice no place was I going – finding peace in a method of the mind a motion of the body a simple mending of the soul peace is a long fast run for there is no pain in the night and you can think alone fast across the ice
44.
Washout 00:25
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Washout January 30, 1992 I am breaking my face cracking I am falling body burning I am twisting dancing in this molten fire I am an island surrounded by this burning sea I am nothing who is me
45.
Aloud, Aloud 01:37
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Aloud, Aloud January 30, 1992 how do I deal with my emotion I am weeping in my distress cannot control it any longer I cradle down in perfect glass how do I deal with my emotion caring such a simple thing I thought to deal with simplicity but it is not so all I do is cause distress to those I care for I cannot tell them of love and love the rules forbade what am I to say I am so worried I have found that I hurt others when all I want is to avoid their pain language lending to misconception and I do not know am I telling my truth in the words sometimes it seems I am alone nowhere to run no one to care for the fall I spin out of control diving towards the ground but the ground is equidistant a half halved, halved extended in pain I wait for the end halved again, and never come I still can’t talk can’t communicate at the going rate perhaps to feel rejected and I wonder if it’s true that we keep hurting each other and it seems I might be right so I wonder am I hurting which pain is felt will the end be alone lost to the world
46.
Back Breaker 01:02
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Back Breaker February 1, 1992 it’s six to one none of the other uneven odds no chance to recover it’s dreaming terror no way for waking a one way journey the trip you’re taking another lie you line them up take them in you know it’s gonna cut play with the visions this artificial dreaming cold sweat, hot blooded your body screaming you come down now part way from human don’t want to give it up another line you take you crawl back up like crawling matters just this feeling you think you’re feeling flying for falling your body wasted your money spent awake in alleys your mind much bent no chance to have now nor to recover body long sold to your next hit
47.
Faith 00:28
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Faith February 1, 1992 dive head first forward feet stretched back eyes closed enter the water from which never to rise stay down as long as they give you air trust that they give you breath belong here under
48.
Fine Tuning 01:19
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Fine Tuning January 30, 1992 my messiah is a radio song to find an answer takes so long in the daylight nothing’s wrong but how I hate the night my messiah is a melody lifts my soul like a religion takes me to my own nirvana out of body, out of mind I have nothing to leave behind for though in daylight all is fine how I hate the night I hold a candle above my bed see my body lying there I thought this would scare me but I don’t mind my body is a moth spiraling into the candle I hold I see destruction in the midnight hours but in the music I hold my power I hang on to the slippery slope toss me a line my messiah, I am falling sing me a song and my body lies in candlelight as I watch the world slip away circling down, circling down to the light my messiah, I am drowning sing me a song

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released October 19, 2012

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Wetdryvac's Lair Weld, Maine

Wetdryvac is a consulting device, a musician, and a free will procedural ethicist. This makes for some seriously odd material from time to time, much of which is worked with here as Wetdryvac's Lair.

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